Previously
2
I smiled after Tara told me about her text home. She smiled too. She sipped her beer and nibbled at her food. Her chin had some of the red from the fries she was having. She whistled because the fries were hot and yet she ate them.
“So, what do you think is their story?” Tara asked me, her eyes sparkling as she said that. Her light brown eyes, bounced the little sources of light in the bar, just right.
I shifted in my seat and glanced at the table with the other couple. Both of them were studying the menu intently. The girl was certainly older than Tara, and unlike Tara, she was dressed in a long kurta. I couldn’t see what kind of pants she was wearing, but the way the kurta hugged her body — was enough for my eyes. She was thicker than Tara, but with no bulge, no folds of skin, at least not any that could be seen with her clothes on.
I turned my head towards Tara, and said, “They must have been together for at least a couple of years. They have probably talked about getting married. They have shopped, both him and her, so, I think there’s an occasion coming up, maybe someone’s wedding. And —” I sipped my whisky. It was almost finished. I could afford one more, considering that I will be sitting for a 2-hour long movie before getting behind the wheel. I continued after a pause, deciding that I’ll order one more before leaving the bar, “— and, they will leave for home after dinner, and sleep naked.”
“That was, quite a twist in the end,” Tara laughed.
“That’s not really a twist. A girl and a guy, in a bar. Chances are they will end up naked together in a bed,” I said.
Tara smiled, and puffed her cheeks, before saying, “Okay,” she scratched her nose, and leaned back on the chair, “why would they simply sleep, instead of fucking?”
The way Tara sat, with the tight white tee-shirt, bare arms, and her hair framing that beautiful face, I stuttered. I usually have something better to say than what I did, “Umm, I don’t know. They don’t seem like the kind of people who fuck on a Friday.”
“And you can tell that by looking at them?” Tara said.
“I have my gifts,” I said. I waved at the waiter for a repeat of my drink.
“And what kind of people fuck on a Friday?”
I leaned forward, and said, “People like us.”
Tara’s smile softened. She didn’t laugh, she didn’t look away. Instead, we looked into each other’s eyes. It was difficult for me to not look away from her eyes. They had questions, they had doubts. We were quiet, staring at each other. It was Tara that time, who shifted in her chair. She pulled her tee shirt down, adjusting it for no reason at all.
The server gave me my new drink, and I asked for some more ice. When I waited for the ice, I asked Tara, “What are you looking for, Tara?”
“Looking for in men?”
“No. I mean, yeah. But, what are you looking for in dates like these? Bumble dates, Hinge dates, or whatever other apps you use,” I said, fidgeting with my glass of whisky.
Tara leaned forward on the table, resting her elbows on the table, “I don’t know actually. I started all this because I…” Tara sighed, “I have been going through some rough times. The studies are hard and, I don’t really have a lot of friends here. I’ve always been in Bombay and almost all my school friends have left the city to study engineering or medicine. At college, I have classmates, not friends. So,” she shrugged, “I thought I can meet some new people.”
“Hmm,” I said, putting a couple of cubes of ice into my glass of whisky.
Tara squinted and crossed her arms. I looked at her, sipped my whisky, and said, “That’s nice.”
“Why am I sensing condescension in your tone?” she said, her tone didn’t have the usual playfulness that it had all evening.
“Condescension? Not at all,” I looked at my glass, “it’s just that dating apps aren’t the best places to meet new people. Especially men. Because you would end up meeting people like me,” I sipped from my glass, waiting for her response.
“You have been alright. It has been a chill evening. And —”
“No, what I meant was,” I leaned forward, and lowered my voice, “you’d meet men like me, who would spend the entire date, trying to figure out how they would invite you over to their place.”
Tara shrugged, “You don’t have to spend the rest of the date thinking about it. I mean, we still have a couple of hours, and I don’t see why I won’t go to a man’s place, whom I had met only a few hours ago. Especially, given that it’s Friday. And as you said, people like us fuck on Fridays, right?”
That backfired. I didn’t mean to offend Tara, but I did.
“Ah, meet condescension with sarcasm,” I had to be defensive, “I didn’t meet to offend you. I am having a lovely time. A beautiful young girl, a fair bit of alcohol, and a movie to look forward to.”
“Don’t forget the couple who have been going to the exact same places we have been going to, and who will go home and sleep naked. Without fucking,” Tara said, smiling. She was done with her beer.
The place we were at, was quite small. It was cozy, but it also meant that we could hear almost every conversation if we focused hard. The other couple was quietly talking. The girl was smiling, and bobbing her head to a remix of “Maan meri jaan”. Fun song, I must say. The guy was on his phone. They were in a cushioned cubicle, meant for seating four. When I and Tara had walked in, that was occupied. I am not a big fan of the high bar stools and tiny tables, that I and Tara were sitting at.
And then, there was another couple, probably married who walked in. The guy was talking to a server, who was in a coat and had a badge. He was animated, smiling. The woman behind her looked sullen. She was thicc and wore a floral patterned kurta. Her face was round and puffy, and her lips had dark red lipstick. She looked around the place, almost bored of it. Our eyes met and then, I had an idea.
“So, Tara, let’s meet some new people?”
“What?”
“I have little time to explain. But, would you be okay, if we somehow ended up, sharing the table with that couple?”
Tara looked at the couple, who had been doing the same things that we had been doing all evening.
I was looking at the server, in a coat and badge, trying to tell the other couple that they were full.
“You have to answer quickly. The window is slim,” my tone was earnest.
“Okay, I guess. But how —”
“Perfect,” I got up from the table and walked to the server in a coat and badge.
It was a weird conversation, to say the least. Despite my relatively lower inhibitions after some alcohol, I am not used to walking up to strangers and making myself part of a conversation. Very few times it has led to good things.
The server was disoriented when I offered to help solve the quandary.
“But sir, do you know the other guests?”
“I don’t know them at all. But I and my date are almost done with our things. We don’t want to rush out since we have a movie later,” I stopped myself from oversharing, “I thought that this way, these guys can have a table right away, and we can chill and leave a little later.”
“Okay…” the server had clearly not dealt with this kind of request before.
“Alright, let’s go and talk to them,” I said, turning to the couple whom I had been seeing pretty much the entirety of my date.
The guy was the first one to look up when I and the server in the coat approached them.
“Hello sir, sorry to bother you,” he started.
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He explained the situation. I stood there, with a smile, looking at the guy most of the time, but now and then, stealing a glance at the girl, who was listening to the problem intently, with her chin resting on her fingers.
When the server was done, I said, “All of this, only if you don’t mind.” When the guy was quiet, and was looking at the girl, waiting for her response, I added, “I don’t know if you remember, I was the one who almost spilled coffee on you guys at the Starbucks earlier in the evening. I saw you guys at the concert too and now here. That’s my date over there,” I pointed at Tara.
Tara was looking at us. I waved at her when our eyes met. She smiled her sparkling smile, her face a little loose, probably from the alcohol.
The guy smiled and said, “Oh” and then looked at his girlfriend. I looked at her too. Her face wasn’t as stern as before. She smiled, and shrugged, “Yeah, sure. I remember you guys. We were talking about you two.”
“Alright, it’s done then,” I looked at the server.
He smiled and nodded, “I will move your food and drinks, sir.”
I walked up to Tara, held the back of the chair, and leaned down.
“It’s done. Let’s go and sit with them,” I said, in a low voice, my lips close to her ears. Some of her hair brushed my nose. I wish I could have kissed her neck then, it was so close, and so slender and delicate.
“How did you pull that off?” she said, getting up and collecting her phone.
I walked over, collected her jacket, and said, “Well, you said you do this to meet new people. I saved you two more dates.”
Tara shook her head, sighed, and took her jacket from my hand.
The other couple was Khushi and Aniket. When I and Tara approached them, they scooched over, we smiled at each other and sat down with them. I didn’t make a fuss about how to sit, and instead let Tara dictate the flow. She sat beside Khushi and I sat beside Aniket.
I shook hands with Aniket and introduced myself and Tara. He did the same and introduced me to his girlfriend, Khushi. Well, he didn’t use the word girlfriend, but he didn’t say wife either. So, I made my assumptions.
I made a cursory apology again, for barging in on them with the request, and pointed to the couple for whom we had done all this. It wasn’t very satisfying because, when the four of us were looking at the beneficiary of our ‘sacrifice’ of privacy, we saw the guy trying to dance, and the girl was still bored and was looking around. The guy was singing along with the song, only for the girl, which we all eventually agreed to be his wife, to look away or have a deadpan expression whenever she looked at him.
Mine and Tara’s food and drinks were placed on the new table of four. I asked Tara if she wanted another beer, to which she nodded yes. Whenever mine and Khushi’s eyes met, I made it a point to smile, and then turn to Aniket to talk about something random.
It was mostly small talk like what they did for a living and where they lived in the city.
Aniket and Khushi were both architects, although they worked in different roles, in the same firm. Aniket was in fact Khushi’s immediate superior when they met. They eventually changed departments, and now Khushi worked on designing products that go with modern aesthetics and Aniket worked on fitting the designs within a certain budget.
Khushi lived in Chembur and Aniket lived in Ghatkopar. I told Khushi that I lived in Chembur for a couple of years, before shifting to the Western side of the city. It turned out that we lived about a kilometer from each other’s place, and that I had walked past her building many a time. In fact, our favorite cigarette tapri was the same too.
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Aniket was amused by this because he didn’t know Khushi when she smoked.
“I was just barely twenty then, Ani. We all do stupid things at that time,” Khushi said, squeezing his palm.
“I am 30, and I still do stupid things,” I said, to lighten the mood. It didn’t help.
Aniket shrugged his shoulders and sipped his beer. Tara was awfully quiet, probably feeling out of place, among older people reminiscing about things from a time, when she was probably worried about her school essay competition.
Whenever my eyes met with Tara’s, I smiled a broad smile. I wished I had worn a pair of sandals or something from which I could easily get out. I would have liked playing with her feet. Tara leaned back on the sofa and crossed her arms. For a girl who wanted to new people, she was liking the two new people she met, or at least not enjoying it.
Khushi probably realized this, because she asked her, “So, Tara, how did you two meet?”
Tara looked at me, and then said, “Well, we met on Bumble.”
“And this is our first date,” I added.
“Oh!” Khushi said and looked at her boyfriend.
Aniket was helpful. “I bet you never expected the date to end up at a table of four with another random couple.”
Thank you, very much, Aniket, I thought grudgingly.
“Well, it’s not entirely random. We have been doing pretty much the same things that you two were doing. So —”
“I am sure, you are not going to watch a movie, which will be so boring that —” Khushi started saying.
“— Tar has great reviews. And —” Aniket started saying.
“Wait, you guys are going for that movie too?” Tara said, her eyes wide with amusement.
I laughed. Probably a little louder than I should have. Everyone quietened. I sipped my whisky quickly, and said, “Like I said, not entirely random.”
My glass was empty again. I was looking at it when Tara said, “Are you sure you should have another one?”
That was a very mature comment, coming from a 21-year-old, I must say. “I would love to but —”
“Go ahead, have one more. We have a movie ahead of us,” Khushi finished her beer, “we will have a nice nap.”
I smiled and was about to say something to Khushi, when Tara said, “I was reading some of the reviews and the plot. It’s a good movie and has a strong female lead. That’s rare.”
“Thank you!” Aniket said. He pushed his spectacles up and picked up his beer, and raised it for Tara, “finally someone who appreciates art.”
I appreciate art as much as the next guy, but I decided to stay quiet.
I finally decided against another glass of whisky. Instead declared to the table, “I will step out for a cigarette.”
“Do you have one for me?” Tara asked.
“I always have one for a pretty girl,” I said.
Khushi and Aniket laughed, well, more out of cringe than from my charm.
Tara and I got up from the table and started walking out. I extended my hand to Tara and she held it. I squeezed her hand, as we walked to the entrance. I asked a member of staff at the door if this was the designated smoking area. She said yes. I hate designated smoking areas. They aren’t as intimate as smoking rooms. We were simply outside the bar and smoking.
I took out my packet, took two cigarettes out, and handed one to Tara. I lit mine and held the light for Tara. She looked hot smoking. Her thick lips around the cigarette, her slender and delicate body, her bare arms, the tight denim. We had walked around a little around the mall earlier in the evening. But with whisky in my blood, I could unabashedly stare are her body. The way her denim hugged her ass. It was surreal. Her buttocks looked firm, and at the same time, I imagined them to be soft if I get to squeeze them.
The crowd in the mall had thinned out. The concert had ended, but there were still people walking the passage in front of the bar, which was really just a common road. I gestured for Tara to go to a corner, away from a group of loud guys, who were joking about finding someone in the bathroom with their pants down and dick inside a fleshlight.
Tara and I were mostly quiet. I was halfway through my cigarette, when I said, “If you are not enjoying this, maybe we can leave this place early, and —”
“No, I am okay. It’s just…” her voice trailed off. She smoked her cigarette.
“It’s just?”
She shook her head, “Nothing.”
“It’s certainly something,” I touched her bare arm. Her skin was cold. But soft. I caressed with my thumb and said, “Tell me.”
“Well, I feel,” she puffed at her cigarette again, “and it’s just a feeling,” she stubbed her cigarette in the bin next to her, “that, you like Khushi.”
“Oh,” I said.
Even after all this time, even after touching a girl in front of her friends, there are these times when I feel guilty and nervous. Expressing your desire for another woman, in front of another woman whom you desire, is like playing minesweeper. I have won that game a couple of times, without knowing what the fuck I was doing.
When Tara told me that she felt that I liked Khushi, I didn’t have the perfect reply. I liked Khushi. I liked how she talked, I liked her eyebrows, I liked the brown streaks in her hair, I liked how her kurta hugged her thick body, and I liked how much more of her was there than Tara.
But then, there was Tara. In all of the date, we have barely touched each other. I loved her energy. I loved how delicate and slender everything about her was. I loved the intensity of her face and the way her breasts and ass were bigger than the rest of her body.
Honesty is the best policy. But not always.
“I like you,” I said.
She looked up at me. “We are here because I like you. I cleared my entire evening because I like you,” I finished my cigarette and let it fall on the floor, and snuffed it with my feet.
“I love how you look,” I touched her chin and caressed it with my thumb. “And, there’s nothing more that I want right now than to kiss you,” I let my thumb go up to her thick lips. Her lips were wet and soft. Tara didn’t flinch. She parted her mouth and looked down my thumb pressing her lower lip.
“But I can’t,” I said. I removed my hand from her lips.
I took out another cigarette and lit it. I offered Tara one too, but she refused.
“Why not?” she asked, almost inaudible, because of the chattering of children from a family passing us by.
“Because we are here. Because I don’t just want to kiss you,” I stepped closer to her, but facing the same direction that she did, our shoulders touching each other, “I want to push you against a wall, squeeze that delicate neck that you have and kiss you,” I puffed at my cigarette.
“Oh,” Tara said, crossing her arms and looking down at her feet.
“I thought you made us sit together because —”
“Khushi already has a guy. And like I told you, I did that only because I wanted to liven the date up. And to find out if these guys fuck on Fridays,” I said.
“You keep saying that, but how,” she paused, “how are you going to find that out?”
I was hoping she’d ask something like that. I rested my hand on the small of her back. She followed my hand. I let my hand go to the side of her waist, and I gave her a squeeze.
“It’s pretty simple, really. We fuck in front of them, and see what they do.” I dropped the second cigarette and snubbed it.
Tara didn’t respond. I looked at her face. She was chewing her lips, looking around.
“Let’s go inside?” I said.
When we came back, Khushi and Aniket had finished their food. I smiled at Khushi as I sat down, and then looked at Aniket, as I sat beside him.
I finished the remaining food on my plate and looked at the time.
Tara, since coming back from outside, seemed lost in thought. Whenever I looked at her, I found her looking at Aniket or Khushi. And whenever our eyes met, I smiled and she shied away.
When it was time to leave for the movie, it was Aniket who said, “Well, I guess, let’s hope we find seats that are close by?”
He was looking at Tara when he said that.
“Ani, it’s an 11 PM show. I am sure we can sit wherever the fuck we want to,” Khushi said.
On the way to the screen, Tara and I walked hand in hand. Tara’s hand was small and delicate. It felt natural, to hold her hands. It doesn’t happen with everybody. Sometimes the chemistry with a woman never works out, you are always out of sync while walking. Not with Tara.
In front of us, Khushi and Aniket walked, hand in hand, except, Khushi was visibly stumbling. She had her weight entirely on Aniket. I had started loving how well Khushi’s body looked, her figure, almost too good to be real. And yet, it was real and raw.
When we reached the theatre, and scanned our tickets, the designated auditorium hadn’t been cleaned yet. Other than us four, there were 2 guys waiting in front of the auditorium. They didn’t look like friends, just two insomniacs, catching a late-night show.
Khushi kept making jokes about how awful and boring the movie would be, and Aniket kept defending it. Tara would chime in for his support too. For someone who didn’t choose the movie, she knew an awful lot about it. I didn’t let go of her hand all along, and neither did Aniket let Khushi stray very far away from him.
When the doors to the auditorium opened, I expected more people to show up, but nobody else did. The two other guys sat in the last row and four of us sat pretty much in the middle row and middle columns of that row.
Tara, me, Khushi, and Aniket — that’s how we sat.
It was a good movie. Good visuals, and spurts of good music. But, I read about all this in reviews later, while I was writing this. While the movie was playing though, all four of us were busy with other things.
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